5/21
((from Abbie))

It came as a whisper when I was least expecting it.

“I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you, not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

I was 17, and a ticking time bomb of self-destruction over the past several years. I longed to hear from the Lord, and when I didn’t, I ran the other way. My fear was deeply rooted in the belief that I was not good enough to be loved enough. And yet, there I was, nursing a broken heart in the dead of night, and the words came clearly and cleanly. I knew I was not conjuring a message I wanted to hear, simply because I hadn’t picked up my Bible at that point in time for a solid six months. I hadn’t remembered that Jeremiah 29:11 was even “a thing”. And yet, there it was.

“I have GOOD plans for you.” said the Lord, and I wept.

Almost ten years later, and I find myself sitting in the same discomfort, although pieces of the story have been altered. The lie that I’m not loved has dissolved, and my energy is now spent running towards the Lord, instead of away. And yet, there is still a lingering struggle that I am not seen. That somehow, in the expanse of all the world and all its creatures, I am lost to the eyes of the Father.

I’m currently feeling the weight of a cross-country move, as well as a huge job transition for my husband, paired with the stress that comes with being the sole income provider (for now). There has been so much unknown over the past year, and so much yet to be uncovered, and I forget that the Lord’s definition of good means a promise that I will prosper, and not be harmed.

I’ve struggled with uncovering what the Lord’s definition of good is. We are promised little in this life. No set salary, location, husband/wife, child, house, animal… the list goes on, and I have often felt like I am drowning in the unknown that the definition seems to hold. But just when I reach the peak of all the uncertainty that this year has held, I am pointed gently back to this verse, and the words I feel He is saying stirring in my soul.

I know the plans for you. 

Rest, child. I know what is to come. I am the one who laid the very foundation of your life. I know the last piece of the puzzle. Your future is in Good Hands.

Plans to prosper you, not to harm you.

My definition of good never includes harm. Sure, there will be discomfort, struggles, and sometimes even pain. But ultimately, these plans will cause you to flourish and thrive. 

Plans to give you a hope and a future.

My plans for you are full of HOPE. No matter the desperation you may feel now, I have a future planned out for you. A big, bold, beautiful future.

 I’m not always going to tell you what my plans are. But I will tell you I’m looking out for ya.

I see you.

I’m piecing your future together. I’m orchestrating plans. Just remember, that these will ultimately bring healing and hope. Lots and lots of hope.